Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Taking the next step...

Well I made the call and set up our 2nd fertility appointment. The first one we scheduled we cancelled because we got our BFP. I'm excited and sad at the same time. Sad at the fact that it's come to this and for what ever reason after 9 months of trying and having perfect timing, we just haven't been successful. Excited because I am so ready to take the necessary steps in figuring out if there's an underlying reason for what I would call our 'unexplained infertility'.

I'm confident that my OB won't brush us off but I have this fear that she won't take a very aggressive approach since: a) we already have one child, and b) since I had the miscarriage in February (5 months into our TTC journey). When we met with her to confirm the pregnancy/loss, she was very supportative in being as aggressive as we wanted to be. So that gives me hope.

In the past 9 months I have really changed my habits/diet. I make a conscious effort to eat healthier, drink lots of water (which is a huge step for me) and if I have bad day I allow myself to drink a caffeine free drink. I have tried to educate myself in ways to best prepare my body to be in the best 'shape' possible to be a welcoming environment to grow a little miracle for 40 weeks.

All of a sudden out of nowhere, last Friday I couldn't eat or drink anything without being in such awful pain. Then, not eating brought on the same effects. I tolerated it as long as I could and decided to go to urgent care on Sunday, after church. The staff advised me that they were so limited on what they could do (not able to run any lab test, ultrasound, etc) so they advised me to go to the ER. They got me checked in, got some blood, urine and then did an ultrasound of my "upper quadrant", checking my liver, right kidney, pancreas and gall bladder. After the results were in, the Dr let us know everything looked good and she suspected that the pain is probably due to a peptic ulcer. She advised me to follow up with my primary dr this week and that a scope would likely be done to confirm it that is what was causing the pain. She prescribed a couple different drugs and had a nurse come in to administer them. The first thing was a Prevacid, and then gave me a GI cocktail. OMG...that was one of the most non pleasant things I've ever drank. It really should be given with a straw. My entire mouth, lips, tongue, and throat was numb. Scary stuff...I did not like the feeling at all.

So after I drank that the nurse asked if I wanted the pain killer the dr had ordered, I said no, if this was going to work and get me some relief, I didn't need anything else. Well it didn't do anything for the pain so I said, 'Yup, I'm going to need something else...this is only numbing my throat'. I just loved how the nurse responded by saying, "I'm not surprised"...well then why in the world didn't you explain that to me to begin with. UGH!! I couldn't even understand what she was calling it, she just kept saying it was a 'pain reliever'. Then she said do you want it in your butt or your arm??...HUH???...I said, 'oh, it's a shot'...well I picked my arm. Well it definitely did the trick, I no longer had any pain but yikes...I didn't hardly feel anything. Maybe 10 minutes went by and she came in with my discharge papers. I asked if it was a muscle relaxer and she said no, "it's the strongest narcotic we have". 'Oh, ok' ((I looked over at my husband and said well that explains why I'm feeling like I am)). She said, don't worry, I will get you a wheel chair. DUH...there was no way I could walk out. Surprisingly we weren't there very long from the time we checked in till I was being wheeled out...about 2.5 hours.

She pushed me outside and we waited while my hubby went to get the car. As I was sitting there waiting, I just started feeling really weird and told the nurse, "I think I need to lay down". She said, yea it's hot out here, let me push you back inside in the air conditioning. Well, that didn't work, so again I told her I needed to lay down. So she pushed me over to a double chair (two chairs with no arm in the middle) and laid me down. She started yelling at the security guard to get someone to help her (I'm guessing at this point I looked like Casper's twin). I vaguely remember another nurse being there and getting me back in the wheel chair so they could lay me down on a bed. I again, said, I just really need to lay down...and that's the last thing I remember until I was in a room and they were trying to get me into a bed. I was barely conscious and between my blood pressure bottoming out and the affects of the medicine (which I now know is called Dilaudid) I couldn't hardly open my eyes, let alone be of any assistance to get myself into bed. I do remember thinking, oh please don't drop me. After they got me back into the bed and got me hooked up to the monitors, panic set in...my BP was only 60/43 with a pulse of 47.

I was given a dose of something to counter act the Dilaudid and hooked up to an IV, that was running wide open. They brought me some crackers, peanut butter and a sprite...which was really appreciated since I hadn't eaten since breakfast, which was just a handful of cheerios. Every time I tried sitting up, my BP would drop and I would get sick to my stomach...this went on for several hours. They had to give me another dose of meds that counter the affects of the Dilaudid and then gave me something for the nausea. Five hours after I was initially discharged, I was finally able to sit upright and make it to the car.

I'm so thankful for the Prevacid because it is really helping but I'm worried because although it's Category B for pregnancy, I hate to take anything that could affect an unborn child. I'm just hoping and praying I will only have to be on it for a few weeks to give the ulcer time to heal and then I won't have to take it anymore, or at least long enough to get through a pregnancy.  I know in the end, I will do what ever I have to do for a healthy pregnancy...whether I like it or not.

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